And sorry to burst your ‘denial bubble’, but we are all addicts.
In some shape and form.
To some degree.
When under pressure or inflamed by anxiety, we all either distort reality or attempt to control our environment.
And when our actions do not work our natural response is to try the same thing again.
And that is the definition of the addict.
Doing the same thing and expecting a different result.
Folks, we are deeply affected by people, places and things.
Our emotional state is governed by outside stimulus, until we are humiliated into humility and evolve into a higher state.
Only then do we realize the very actions we use to alleviate our anxiety actually heighten our anxiety and destroy our peace of mind.
So we blindly or innocently resort to the same thoughts, behaviours and habits to get the desired result.
Repeat and repeat.
The list is endless.
And we all have a go to….
A faithful servant.
A trusted admirer.
A short cut.
An achilles heel.
A dark side.
A melting portrait of Dorian Gray.
We are ALL so despairingly predictable.
When you breakdown the behaviour and divorce the consequences, the charming old lady who goes to her local GP three times a week is no different to the street junkie sticking a needle in his arm.
The CEO who lives in Vaucluse and works fourteen hours a day is no different to the dole recipient in Tweed Heads who smokes cones non stop.
The Instagram model who starves herself for her adoring fans is no different to the beer bloated piss head sitting on his favourite bar stool.
The Facebook poster daily lamenting the defeat of Hilary Clinton is no different to the right wing Doomsdayer building bomb shelters in his backyard.
The parent who looks at their WHOLE life through the lens of their children or the old, single man sitting in his dusty, stained arm chair watching repeat after repeat of Ali world title fights.
The HR Director judging all worker behaviour through a policy and procedure manual or the jailed banker still hiding behind his product disclosure statement.
The weekly blogger trying to show people an easier, softer way.
All in denial.
All justifying their beliefs.
All excusing the damaging outcomes of their finite behaviour.
All avoiding reality or controlling their environment.
All uncomfortable in their own skin.
And I know the obsessives will shout me down and the creatives will burn incense for my soul, but some of the most dangerous and delusional men and women I have met are CEO’s, politicians and the religious.
The so called pillars of society.
And guess what?
Through all my loss and pain, and the resultant awakening, I was able to see through the propaganda of success and own my own shit.
Yes, the very beliefs and values that are supposed to make us well actually make us sick, because we are living a lie.
We are striving for a reality that does not exist.
It has been created by white men to sell shit.
Make that money.
Look a certain way.
Be seen there.
Be seen with her and him.
Earning that title.
Shining that badge.
Bearing that load.
Trinket, baubles and feathers.
We are driven by stuff.
The greatest example of creation are driven by stuff and fluff.
It is embarrassing.
It is a tragedy.
Yet we all do it.
We all succumb to it.
And oh how the creatives avoid and the obsessives deny.
Yet, no matter how great the gulf is between us we are so, so alike.
It is an undeniable law of nature.
A final musing…
I will be turning 57 years of age in just over a week.
Born on November 1st, 1961.
All Saints Day in Catholic speak.
A holy day of obligation.
When rubbish bins were made of steel and backyards were as long as an Olympic swimming pool.
Milk was delivered in glass bottles and kids played on the street.
It was a different time but what is not different is two simple traits I have detected in every human being I have met.
Put simply, we are divided into two types.
The first type of human being is the creative.
They like to distort reality.
The second type is the obsessive.
They like to control the environment.
Generally, the creatives are the left wing, social thinkers.
Generally, the obsessives are the right wing, rule makers.
Creatives break the rules the obsessives make.
Obsessives discredit the social fabric the creatives weave.
It is the way of the world.
Like gravity, it is an undeniable law of nature.
Even in the world of the spirit, human beings divide their Gods into the dogmatic and the mystical.
Each has a place but unfortunately addiction creates fanaticism.
So, if you are deeply offended by what I have written please accept my apology.
But when you next wake up in the suffocating dark before the impending dawn, what is your looming fantasy?